Got Funny

Number 10
Life is sexually transmitted.
Number 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8
Men have two emotions:
Hungry & In Heat. If you see him not excited, make him a sandwich.

Number 7
Give a person a fish & you feed him for a day; teach a person to use the Internet & he won’t bother you for weeks.

Number 6
Some people are like a Slinky……….
not really good for anything, but you still can’t help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

Number 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Number 2
In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now The world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1
THOUGHT FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES:We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among
the millions of cows in America , but we haven’t got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants & terrorists are located.
 
Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge??