Got Funny

 
I am surprised my mother did not think of this first!

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A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the
door.
The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing
in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.
‘Not a chance,’ says the husband, ‘it is 3:00 in the morning!’ He slams
the door and returns to bed.
‘Who [...]

This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries..But, now we know.
If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race … you’re a male chauvinist.
If you stay home and do the housework … you’re a pansy.
If you work too hard … there’s never any time for [...]

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
nearby table.
My wife asked,’ Do you know her?’ ‘Yes,’ I sighed, ‘She’s my old
girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up
those many [...]